Thursday, March 20, 2008
THE LONG GOOD FRIDAY
It's the beginning of the Easter break tomorrow. However, Easter in Britain this year is apparently going to look like this:
... but less picturesque in places like Welling or New Brighton, obviously.
To paraphrase lovely right wing anti abortionist Eurovision winner Dana, according to all sources, colder weather is on the way. There is a threat of three snowflakes bringing the national rail network to a halt.
As is traditional at this time of year, the TV news reporters feel compelled to describe the awful fate that awaits anyone who attempts to leave the country for warmer climes.
You may wish to keep a record of the number of times the following phrases are used in news reports:
"traffic chaos"
"engineering works on railways closing many stations"
"gridlocked roads as people leave work early"
"threatened strike by baggage handlers at many airports"
"disgruntled passengers face overnight waits as flights are cancelled"
"disgruntled junior TV reporters left to hold fort reading same cliched Easter-related stories every bloody year as more senior staff swan off on long haul flights to paradise islands"
Anyway, I should warn you that, hey ho, the next four days are going to be a *Higher Hell* and you will all be *hot cross bunnies*...
I'll be back tomorrow with a competition, for those of you who are left stranded, alone and sad at home.
... but less picturesque in places like Welling or New Brighton, obviously.
To paraphrase lovely right wing anti abortionist Eurovision winner Dana, according to all sources, colder weather is on the way. There is a threat of three snowflakes bringing the national rail network to a halt.
As is traditional at this time of year, the TV news reporters feel compelled to describe the awful fate that awaits anyone who attempts to leave the country for warmer climes.
You may wish to keep a record of the number of times the following phrases are used in news reports:
"traffic chaos"
"engineering works on railways closing many stations"
"gridlocked roads as people leave work early"
"threatened strike by baggage handlers at many airports"
"disgruntled passengers face overnight waits as flights are cancelled"
"disgruntled junior TV reporters left to hold fort reading same cliched Easter-related stories every bloody year as more senior staff swan off on long haul flights to paradise islands"
Anyway, I should warn you that, hey ho, the next four days are going to be a *Higher Hell* and you will all be *hot cross bunnies*...
I'll be back tomorrow with a competition, for those of you who are left stranded, alone and sad at home.
Labels: Dana, Easter chaos, Echo And The Bunnymen, snow, Welling
