Tuesday, June 02, 2009
MOULDY OLD DOUGH
The sun has put in its annual all too brief appearance (weather reporters immediately start reassuring us that we have to *make the most of it* because gale force winds and lashing rain are around the corner in, uh, twelve hours' time).
This means that people start to wear less clothes (couldn't care less about this) but also that they start to become more touchy feely, free spirited and "Continental" (whatever the fuck that means).
I strongly disapprove of British people being touchy feely and free spirited. Or non-British people, for that matter. Do I really have to explain why?
One of the aspects of this changed behaviour involves middle aged couples.
Suddenly, they start to hold hands in the street, in broad (sunny) daylight.
Oh come on, stop blethering on about being "young at heart". Bullshit. You just look as if you're simple, clueless and need mummy to help you cross the road. Not very endearing being "young at heart" now, is it?
Ugh, I've seen loads of them out in the past few days - upwards of forty, fifty and even sixty years old. Even the bloke who lives next door to us and his missus. Mind you, perhaps they can be excused because he is a *borderline* alcoholic and she is as daft as arseholes.
Right: I never wear skirts shorter than knee length any more because I'm an old bag and don't want to cause mass spontaneous vomiting in public. Wouldn't it be nice of other people to have some consideration for others and not subject them to their luvv struck second marriage drippiness?
Oh well, as you were. I'm going outside to get skin cancered.
Labels: being young at heart - bleargh, old people, second marriages, sun in Britain - rarity of, touchy feeliness
