Saturday, July 21, 2007
SMILEY MILEY
In the most shocking development since Mike Read, as a tennis fan, announced that he was backing Boris Becker to stand as London Mayor, former Radio One jock and pal of Mike's, Paul Burnett now announces that he is to stand as London Mayor. Here, he explains why.
"A couple of nights ago, I was at a fundraising event with Mike, DLT and a few other showbusiness pals, including Shaky, Cliff, The Icicle Works and a few others. It was a very worthwhile cause - we were raising money for the Retired Radio One Disc Jockeys Association. Those guys do so much to help veteran former jocks who are, say, suffering ill health or, as is the case with poor Noel Edmonds, a terrible financial crisis.
Anyway, talk got around to the nominations for London Mayor. Mike felt, as a tennis fan, there was only one way his vote could go - to Boris Becker. However it inspired me to take the plunge and stand myself!
What will I be focusing on? Well, it's a cause close to my heart - radio in London!
You know, I flick across the radio dial in my car and I get so angry. Whatever happened to quality radio?
I particularly despair about the way my old station - Radio One - has gone downhill.
I listened to it the other day and it was such a racket that I had to switch off after half an hour! All that tuneless new wave music by The Cooks, Katie Nash and The Feelings! What happened to decent quality adult orientated pop music? I particularly objected to some combo called The Twang. Really, it was some guy shouting gibberish about being "on one about the silliest of stuff" in a comedy Brummie accent! I felt as though I'd been dragged back in time and was listening to the comedy Brummie on the hit single I performed on with DLT - Laurie Lingo And The Dipsticks' zany Convoy GB!!!
So, I thought - "enough is enough!!!"
Here are my pledges to all you lovely Londoners to make London radio stations the envy of the rest of the world:
* More playlists full of quality songs by Sutherland Brothers And Quiver, Sad Cafe and The Bellamy Brothers!!!
* More DJ's who can actually do the job! NOT so-called "Shock Jocks" like Joe Wylie and Edith Bowman (can anyone actually understand her accent???!!! As DLT would say, "she's a bonnie wee lassie fray north o'the border!!!!!") No - let's bring back REAL jocks who learnt their chops on the good ship Caroline or at Radio London in the beat music heyday!!!!!
* More jobs at Radio One, Heart and Virgin for DJ's the people really want to hear again - Simon Bates, DLT, Tony Brandon, "The Emperor" Roscoe, Adrian Juste, Mike Read, Peter Powell, "Diddy" David Hamilton and my good self!!!!
* Decent salaries for all of us!!
I hope you'll all be getting behind my campaign which I'm going to be calling the "ONE-DERFUL LONDON" campaign. Here's to a brighter future!!!"
*With thanks to Herr Footman Of The Gestapo for making reference to the Mike Read Comment Is Free article.
*Paul Burnett is appearing in Mother Goose at Bicester Tivoli Theatre from December 3rd.
Labels: 275 and 285, quack quack oops, Quiver from Sutherland Brothers And Quiver, Sir Cliff, Sir Shaky, The Hairy Cornflake, The Icicle Works, Tidybeard - tragic financial predicament of
