Tuesday, April 03, 2007
LIFE IN A KENTISH SITTING ROOM, VOLUME 37
Excerpts from recent conversation. We were both sober at the time.
Geoff: "Have you ever slept in a hammock?"
Me: "No. Have you?"
Geoff: "I don't THINK I have, but I can't be certain."
* * * * * * *
Me: "Blancmange seems to be some sort of Arabic pudding originally. It's a pretty pointless sort of dish really."
Geoff: "Yeah, it is boring."
Me: "Mind you, it's one of those bland foods that my parents said are good for people who have stomach upsets."
Geoff: "Oh, come on, that's bollocks, it's sweet and sickly."
Me: "Yeah, but it's bland. They also thought steamed fish is good for anyone who's ill."
Geoff: (pulls face)
Me: "Just the smell of steamed fish makes me feel sick, it probably reminds me of being a child and having to eat it when I was ill. The other thing they said was that you could cure diarrhea by eating chocolate."
Geoff: Yeah yeah yeah, you've said that before a million times."
* * * * * * *
Geoff: "So, is it common knowledge that Jimmy Savile is a necrophiliac?"
Geoff: "Have you ever slept in a hammock?"
Me: "No. Have you?"
Geoff: "I don't THINK I have, but I can't be certain."
* * * * * * *
Me: "Blancmange seems to be some sort of Arabic pudding originally. It's a pretty pointless sort of dish really."
Geoff: "Yeah, it is boring."
Me: "Mind you, it's one of those bland foods that my parents said are good for people who have stomach upsets."
Geoff: "Oh, come on, that's bollocks, it's sweet and sickly."
Me: "Yeah, but it's bland. They also thought steamed fish is good for anyone who's ill."
Geoff: (pulls face)
Me: "Just the smell of steamed fish makes me feel sick, it probably reminds me of being a child and having to eat it when I was ill. The other thing they said was that you could cure diarrhea by eating chocolate."
Geoff: Yeah yeah yeah, you've said that before a million times."
* * * * * * *
Geoff: "So, is it common knowledge that Jimmy Savile is a necrophiliac?"
Labels: Arabic puddings, Blancmange the rubbish band from Sheffield, housewives' tales, Jimmy Savile, necrophilia
