Friday, December 14, 2007
STINKEROO
As Christmas approaches, an unprecedented number of celebrities have put their names to perfumes and aftershaves in the rush to make a quick buck.
David "Spread 'em, Darlin'" Beckham's Intimately Beckham range is in the shops. "Does it smell of his golden balls then?" I have been heard to remark, with the usual levels of sophistication and understatement.
When I saw Cliff Richard on television promoting his fragrance, which apparently includes frangipani and tuberose, I realised that we have reached some kind of celebrity endorsed perfume critical mass.
FRANK WORTHINGTON
There's a whiff of something awful about it all, even if it does have a top note of ylang ylang ...
When I saw Cliff Richard on television promoting his fragrance, which apparently includes frangipani and tuberose, I realised that we have reached some kind of celebrity endorsed perfume critical mass.
I mean, look at the number of unlikely has-beens, never-weres and Z-list celebs who have got fragrances on the market for a man, a woman, a cat, a dog or possibly all four!
FRANK WORTHINGTON
SHANE MACGOWAN
PAULINE QUIRKE
BILLIE JEAN KING
BILLIE JO SPEARS
MERRILL OSMOND
LES DENNIS
JUDITH DURHAM
HORACE BATCHELOR
JUDITH DURHAM
HORACE BATCHELOR
KEITH WATERHOUSE
MC TUNES
THE RIGHT HON. DOUGLAS HURD
BARRY DAVIES
BARRY DAVIES
GARY DAVIES
SUE POLLARD
THE REBEL MC
TIMMY MALLET
MICHELLE MCMANUS
NORMAN COOK & ZOE BALL
THE MARQUIS OF BATH
DANA INTERNATIONAL
DANA
HAROLD BISHOP FROM NEIGHBOURS
THE SOUP NAZI FROM SEINFELD
THE BASS PLAYER FROM CHAPTERHOUSE
CAROLE MALONE
FORMER OLYMPIC GOLD MEDAL WINNING PENTATHLETE MARY PETERS
NEIL AND CHRISTINE HAMILTON
PHIL COOL
PATTY HEARST
STEVE LAMACQ
SYLVESTER STALLONE'S MUM
GARY KEMP
ERICA ROE
JIM DIAMOND
JIM DIAMOND
MATT LE TISSIER
PETE WYLIE
DJ QUICKSILVER
ROUND THE WORLD YACHTSLADY ELLEN MACARTHUR
MURIEL GRAY
Look, it's ridiculous! Think of all the rare flowers and spices that have been lost to the world just so this sorry list of apologies for human beings can line their pockets (er, in their dreams!)
There's a whiff of something awful about it all, even if it does have a top note of ylang ylang ...
Labels: making a quick buck, MC Tunes, tuberose, what is a critical mass exactly?
