Monday, March 10, 2008


The Observer magazine has spoken! I was reading Billy's blog and found out that, at last, the definitive list of the Most Powerful Bloggers In The World has been announced!

We can all sleep safe in our beds in the knowledge that bloggers have POWER, despite the fact that the people from Ye Olde Mediaeae tend to denounce us all as weedy, speccy, oily haired, five stone internet nerds who never leave the house!

Well - not any more! We've all been at the Weight Gain, have been eating eighteen ounce steaks for breakfast and have been outdoors round the clock, running up mountains, kick boxing and partaking of military manoeuvres on Salisbury Plain. It's brutal, but it's the only way forward in this cut throat world of old and new media.


Even the wimpiest of us now have chests like Fifty Cent (aka The Rapper Fifty Per Cent)!

All of us are aspiring to the Powerfulness of the two most Powerful Bloggers In The World, according to The Observer:

At number one, the hostess with the mostess, laydeez and gentlemen ... it's Abby Lee, aka Girl With A One Track Mind! Since moving to America and staying at a top secret Olympic training facility, she's beefed up to become a rippling, lean mean killing machine, weighing in at 250 pounds of Pure Blogging Power! Who says that gurlls can't rise to the challenge and beat the boys at their own game?

... and, in runner up position ...

It's East Angular's very own JonnyB! Okay, Chris ... um, sorry, Jonny, has always been known as that ginger speccy bloke with the big ego off of the radio with a secret blog, but what you can't see in this picture is the impressive Greek god of a physique that he's been building up below the neck! He's been in training with that bloke who's helped Craig David to beef up and what can you say ... wow! He's irresistible to men, women and even some of the Norfolk wildlife surrounding his house!





i'm prepared to bet the list was compiled by ... a blogger. no-one else cares about us (until one of our ranked masses scores a massive publishing deal - gnash gnash)
Next time someone asks me what my hobbies are and I say "blogging" and they laugh I'll punch them in the face.

I don't think.
I have had Blogger and Podcaster in the Skills section of my cv for at least a year. It is possibly a bit pretentious but I don't care. I take it all quite seriously so why shouldn't it be on my cv - apart from the fact it has nothing to do with my real life job! I scanned the Observer Mag Top 50 Most Powerful Blogs and quite frankly I got a bit bored. Huffington Post was No1. It sort of pissed me off in a spoilt that's not fair way. It made me feel a tinge of wanting to give up. But I won't. Yet. It made me feel like mailing the Observer and telling them what I really thought (because they invite you to at the bottom of the article) but I just couldn't be bothered.
Speaking as Norfolk Wildlife I manage to resist Abby, Chris and Jonny.

Drew met Chris Evans queueing up at security at Stansted Airport. "Far Queue?", he enquired of the speccy one, but forgot the question mark.
That list is bollocks as your blog is obviously the best.

I prostrate myself before your power oh most powerful of the powerful ones.
Hmmm. The thing is, I hadn't heard of most of those blogs. I need to get out and about in the blogosphere a bit more.

And yes, clearly the list is wrongness made manifest because where was your placing, hmmm? HMMM??

The Observer. Pah.
Rivergirlie - the list seems to have been compiled by a number of contributors, one or two of whom may or may not be bloggers (!) How do you define a "powerful" blogger: is it to do with size of audience? Money making abilities? Book deals?

Billy - nobody puts Billy in a corner! Actually, people don't laugh at me when I tell them I'm a blogger. They just look puzzled and I have to spend ages explaining what blogging is ... then they just look puzzled again.

RoMo - Huffington Post is the blog of a "millionaire socialite". Sigh ... no one, apparently, took political blogging seriously until a millionaire socialite was involved. I think the "old" media seems to define successful blogging in terms of money and influence, book deals and so on. I mean, most of us do it as a hobby and know we won't make money from it, but journalists seem to assume we're all angling for book deals or a chance to be on television!

Murph - good to see the "far queue" pun back, in a Spirit Of 2006 way. I'm sure Chris Evans was whisked to the front of the queue and through customs with his entourage. "Norfolk Wildlife" though - have you been kicked out of house and home Murph?

Garfer - not so sure about that. I'm a terrible arm wrestler. JonnyB's daughter could win an arm wrestling contest against me. I could just about get through a half marathon if I walked.

Boz - I haven't heard of most of them either, but then again I live in my own little blogging world. Hmm, it was nice to see Pop Justice in there, oddly enough. That's how shallow I am!
Yes - nothing - NOTHING - happens in Terrington St Clement without my say so.

Plus the big ego bit is unfair on me. YOU would have a big ego if you got to shag Billie Piper and got your own radio 2 show and got to hang out with Gazza. So there.
Kottke is at number 4.
How dissapointing, not the fact that it's on the list, but I thought it was a blog written by Leo.
A blog that reviews the internet that's at number 4?
Hmmm, it's like the injustice of why some entries reach the Top Twenty in the music charts.
I've not heard of most of the blogs on the list and I spend too much time on the net.
As you said, Betty: how do you define a powerful blogger?

It's the usual lazy, out-of-touch, 18-months-late kind of crap that the urbanite media tarts at The Observer love to come up with on a depressingly regular basis.

Don't know about you, but when the mainstream media start accepting blogging, then the game's up isn't it?
What's up with you and Mr Mild Peril today. You've got Evans and he's got Walliams.
And we thought you liked us coming over here.
Jonny - fair enough: you got to shag Billie Piper, but you lost her. Radio Two is pipe and slippers central, a way of easing yourself into the twilight years. Oh, and are you there for Gazza now, when he really needs you? The 1990's were your decade, but they're getting further and further away!

Istvanski - I suppose the number of sites on the internet are multiplying all the time, so it's hard to keep up with everything. I'm not much of a teccy, so don't know anything about those sort of blogs, and I don't visit many of the big name blogs very often either. I suppose I've just set myself up in my little corner from which I "socialise" with a few other commenters, which is probably what most grass roots bloggers do. I know what you mean about not knowing top names on that list or why they got there. A bit like finding out that Herbie Hancock was the winner of Best Album award at the Grammys! Eh?

Malc - well, lists are always popular as a way of "defining" a "movement" without going into much depth in a magazine. I don't know if blogging is dead in the water, but I suppose the most popular stuff has been creamed off and the rest of us have to realise that it's a nice little hobby. I don't have a problem with it but some people probably feel bitter about their writing not being discovered, because they read the likes of The Observer and think that's what blogging is all about!

Kaz - it's a twin pronged attack to make everyone realise that Chris Evans and David Walliams are both great! Hey, look at all the great work they've done for charidee mate! Er ... hello, where has everyone gone? Judging by the dwindling number of comments on this site, you could be right, Kaz.
how very surreal. blogging as cottage industry.

i wish the mainstream would stop bugging us. no you CAN'T come in and you AREN'T invited!
Argh I've just been sick EVERYWHERE. I mean how could you post a picture of such monstrously deformed humanity as that on such an upstanding blog as your own? It's immoral. I can barely look.

I mean, he should at least wear a wig like the pretty lady up top.

Interesting that you posted on this, Betty, as the article really got up my nose and was tempted to let loose with a tirade. "60 most important bloggers" on the planet - 60 dullest, more likely. Yawwwwwwn....zzzzzzz.....

It's interesting to me how the Old Media tried to ignore blogging; then when it turned out to be more than a 5-minute fad, then J S-P and the rest of the fag-hag brigade started decrying it; the subtext being that "Blogging is for amateurs"...but the facts remain: the big blogs get far more hits than any ink edition of any paper on the planet...

That's why Murdoch's buying up social-networking sites...

Your comments were spot on, I thought, when you said: "Sigh ... no one, apparently, took political blogging seriously until a millionaire socialite was involved. I think the "old" media seems to define successful blogging in terms of money and influence, book deals and so on."

Yeah, re-read the first puff-piece on Huffington again - don't you think it's just one of the snidest pieces ever written - basically saying that all blogging was a complete waste of time until Huffington (a professional dillitente Washington Wife) got involved. There's a couple of really insulting paragraphs there, i think, that set the underlying tone of the piece. I thought the subtext that it wasnt a worthwhile activity until big bucks and PR companies got involved totally sucks...fuck 'em, I say. I think it's because most of them missed the bus and they know it, so they now want to define the terms in which blogging, Internet 2.0, etc are perceived by opinonless civilians...

We were talking about a similar theme on Discharge the other day - about how corrupt the UK art-world is - it's just a web of interlocking business interests - we were saying that they'll all be crowing about Web Art movements in 5 years time (once they've found a way for their clients to make money out of it)....by which point, the rest of us will have got bored and moved on, penniless and not much wiser lol

Oh, and what about that dreary "Englishwoman in Paris" Petite Fuck-up or whatever she's called lol....she shouldn't even be in the top 6000 hit-wise....buuuut: interesting that she was also in the travel section that week, I think...she's got her cosy little 2-book deal with Penguin - let me guess, I bet the Observer or Guardian on-line book-shop will be doing some sort of 2 quid-off special deal for it (it's the sort of booojois bollocks they excel at) - they're prob. already in bed with penguin (lol) before the ink's even dry at the printer lol. It's all so shameless it makes me blush - but they're all secretly gritting their teeth, thinking how much a million-hits-a-day blog could make by endorsements alone.
I admit it, I have been maneuvering on Salisbury Plain, but only because it's the quickest way to work.
and please, please tell me that Jonny B is not CE, I may have to self harm if that's the truth, I think JB is quite funny . . .
I am by nature a tolerant, peacifist, but if I ever had the chance to goad that smarmy Perez Hilton into taking the first swing it would be one of the best days of my life...
I suspect he has a glass jaw but what are you gonna do? Basically he epitomizes everything that I loathe about Humans and our vapid so-called culture...what a f*cking waste of amino acids!

I think that it's ridiculous to be rated by the 'Media'...don't they understand WHY this is more interesting? While they re-arrange the deck chairs on their sinking ship they just might figure out that the 21st Century belongs to the everyman, the so-called free thinking amateur.

You had to know that having your own e-zine was too good to be true and that the corporations would find a way to make some money from advertisers and ruin it.
To hell with them.
FN - "blogging as cottage industry"? Yeah, too true. That's the only reason any of us go into it in the first place, isn't it? With our five year plan, running around trying to get sponsors and what have you! Afer all, isn't that what everybody does with their hobby?

Fathorse - it's a shame though, isn't it? He's down to his last twenty million AND has a face like that. Perhaps it's good to think about those who are less fortunate every so often.

Kek - "Huffington's success made the first generation of bloggers look like two-bit prospectors panning for nuggets in shallow creeks before the big mining operations moved in" - ye gods, they really think that's what blogging is all about do they? Two-bit prospectors? A very skewed idea of why people do anything, with an eye on the main chance, although in the end of course we're supposed to let the big earners walk all over us because They Know Best! I thought The Observer was meant to be a liberal paper but that suggests the most cynical kind of capitalism, where there isn't even any room for the idea of competition! I don't really hold a grudge against bloggers who end up with publishing deals or as journalists (a lot of writers on the internet deserve far more recognition), but it's bad form to slag off the ones who don't "achieve". It isn't a competion, or a corporate awards ceremony.

Ziggi - watch out for the landmines on Salisbury Plain. I think you'll find that JonnyB IS Chris Evans. He has to occupy his time with something other than his Radio Two show, doesn't he?

Donn - Perez Hilton has just been given a Bloggie award, hasn't he? So, unfortunately, The People Have Spoken. Oh well. I suppose he epitomises what celebrity culture is about nowadays (along with about five bleedin' million other vapid types in Hollywood and London). What you say about corporations moving in on blogging is true, but they'll leave the maverick, interesting blogs alone, with any luck.
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Have I missed something really important? I have never thought Johnny B is Chris Evans. Is he? For a while I thought he might be my old friend Johnny Bean who I did my degree with but only because he was the only person I knew who was called Johhny and who's surname began with B. Aside from that - has the real Johhny B been googling himself since Sunday as he has cropped up here and on Oye Billy and I haven't seen him here before unless of course he is a secret lurker...?
"I thought The Observer was meant to be a liberal paper but that suggests the most cynical kind of capitalism, where there isn't even any room for the idea of competition!" Hmmmm, yeah, well, appraently we were wrong....

Interesting you should mention book-deals...there's some scraggy little git in the Work Section of the Grauniad who's, what, 19, 20? from (groan) St. martin's art-college whose first novel (about the internet) is being published soon - he holds forth saying that he doesn't read blogs or take part in social-networks because the blogs are full of talentless shites....anyone can post their writing on the internet, he sneers, that's why it's full of rubbish. (I'm paraphrasing) I'm thinking of naming and shaming the little shit - I expect he's already got a gallery deal lined up for his artwork too.

Sorry, haven't had me fig syrup this morning...
RoMo - I doubt that the real Chris Evans would be able to hide behind anonymity. His ego wouldn't stand for it. As for bloggers Vanity Googling themselves ... who would have thought it? Not that I've ever Vanity Googled ... er, well, not that I've found anything interesting about myself from Vanity Googling ... because there isn't anything interesting and not many people read this blog ... ahem.

Kek - sounds like an obnoxious little brat. Perhaps it's all down to youthful arrogance though ... or down to not yet having any setbacks in life. The problem with being a wunderkind who gets a publishing deal at 18 is that everyone will have forgotten about you by the time you are 30. A real shame that, heh heh. I hope he's aware of the old adage about being nice to all the people you meet on your way to the top, because you'll meet them all coming back down again. Oh, and naming and shaming? Why not?

One of the things he said was that people who spend all their time blogging don't have any *real* life experiences to write about, like wot he doz...gosh, and him being such a whippersnapper lol.
I'm a bit disturbed by the vitriol & knee jerk reactions of 'if you're on a list you must be shit'. Is that not just inverted snobbery?

What's so funny 'bout peace love & understanding?

(I declare an interest in that I'm a bit in love with JonnyB and don't hate Petite Anglaise either)
Kek - maybe he's done a lot in a such a short life though ... whereas bloggers just have a rich internal life!

Beth - yeah, I can see your point. Bloggers tend to get a bit miffed if they don't get recognition ... they're only human, sob. Don't really bear a grudge against any of the A-list "real" bloggers meself. Most people's vitriol seems to be aimed at the way that blogging is represented in the media - the idea that big money and "power" (?) are the criteria to judge anything by. I wish JonnyB had had the power to stop the Post Offices being shut, myself. Maybe if he'd got Huffington Post in on the campaign, eh?
Apologies for the way my responses to comments here have been complete gibberish. I'm really winging it because I'm not used to thinking about things. This started out as a frivolous post and I'm having to deal with the opinions of intelligent people. Being pretty stupid I'm getting into a right old state about it! Normal service will be resumed ASP (probably the YouTube clip of Lee Marvin singing I Was Born Under A Wanderin' Star, as promised before).
Blimey RockM... I'd have chosen a bit of a more unusual name if I wanted to do that I think. Save a lot of scrolling through pages.

As it was, I just rang up Evan at blogspot/Google and told him to do a search for me. No probs.
Betty, I think the way the media doesn't seem to know from one second to the next where it stands on blogging/bloggers is funny; and the funniest part of it is that 'they' really can't seem to grasp that there are bloggers who *gasp* genuinely don't care about lists & rankings & influence & being validated by 'proper' writers. I love that there are so many opinions out there and so many people without vested interests saying interesting (or banal) things...

Sorry - I'm not used to having a sustained thought either - I'm getting a bit gushy! Any minute now I'll be saying "I love bloggers me, they're my best mate" ...
Johnny - you actually ring up Evan yourself? I normally get one of my people to do it.

Beth - exactly, they don't see why anyone would do this unless they're out to make money or get, er, critical acclaim. Mind you, I do get a buzz from bloggers I respect linking to me or paying compliments, even if it is only done out of good manners or because they feel sorry for me. I'll probably start crying soon ...
Uuurm, I'm not (if that's all right with everyone else?)
Reg - you're not what??
Uurm, uurm.....irresistable to Norfolk wildlife?
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