Saturday, October 28, 2006


This weekend sees the "end" of British Summertime. The mornings will be lighter, the evenings darker, because of the simple nudging back of the clock by one hour.

This is man fooling with nature and oh, how I despise it!

I wish to celebrate the arrival of winter in my own way, by worshipping the changes that nature imposes herself. I suppose you could call me a Pantheist! I am in awe of Nature - her power, her whims.

In the early hours of the morning, I will drive to Bursted Woods, Kent, throw off my clothes and run among the trees. I will lie on the ground, moaning and crying. If there is fox excreta, I will roll around in it like a dog! We are all dogs under the skin! I will also recite one of my favourite poems: a poem I wrote to celebrate the arrival of winter, a time many see as a time of gloom. I see it as a time when, as it were, there is a shedding of the skin! Amidst all the darkness there is a newness - yes, a re-birth through the death of everything! I love that rawness, my goodness. I love winter's .... RAWNESS AND COLDNESS.

Here is my poem:

formaldehyde top
Is Easy, Resume, Let ...
Scripture Timing

Gold digger wisdom tooth

Black arts,
Black rites,
Circuit breaker.

Pre history.

Thank you for reading. I hope I have changed you.

Dr Ernest Furrowbrow

Bravo, bravo, Dr Ernest Furrowbrow ! That was FUCKING GREAT ! Aye, the nights are fair drawin` in.
Dr. Ernest, you are a powerful force! I think that you should embrace the powerful forces of wisdom and roll around in the fox poo. I've got plenty if you want to come and roll around in my back garden.

I am a pantheist too.
Darling, everyone is doing that this year. What happened to originality?
Ooh, it's lovely. I definitely feel changed. It reminds me of something - some kind of genre of poetry - what's it called? Oh yes, Flarf...
Thank you for your wonderful, inspiring comments. You inspire me so! The words are within us all, and they tumble out hither and thither! We also tumble about hither and thither in a physical way!

You have inspired me to dance around my garden, in preparation for tonight's celebration of the arrival of winter. Let the music lift my soul! And your souls!
Ernest ... you are wolf too!

Can I join you in the Fox Shit? It's not a Sky subscription channel is it?

And as for Bursted Woods .... wear the Fox Hat!

PS Don't forget to put your clock back an hour tonight!
so everyone plans to be an hour late and nude, then smear themselves with dung and run around stealing underwear...

yeah, ok. I'm in.
Murphmeister - "wear the fox hat" ... is this a coded message, of the sort that were used in the Second World War? Careless talk costs lives! All joking aside, I don't care for the wearing of animal skins, and am a member of PETA.

First Nations - yes, it is a return to the primitive within us all. Only when man returns to his original state and is at one with the trees and earth and animals can he truly rise above it all to create ... art.

I will not be stealing underwear, where did you get that idea?
No Ernest. I just wondered where it was, that's all. My jokes never look as good when they are written down.
I'm totally with you on wearing animal skins by the way.

Me and Oz are exceptions of course as we look quite fetching in them.
Bloody hippies, rolling around in the fox poo. Don't they realise the damage they're doing to the countryside?
Murphmeister - I am still puzzled about "wear the fox hat". I am a lover of words, the feel of them, their meaning and hidden meanings. I will pursue this matter and find out what this expression means!

Mark Gamon - but the hippies are so wrongly derided! We have not heeded their warnings and as a result we suffer. What beautiful words are these:

"we are star-dust,
we are gold-en,
and we've got to get our-selves
back to the gar-den"
May I take the liberty of adding :

"Well, maybe it's the time of year
Or maybe it's the time of man
And I don't know who I am
But life's for learning..."

Fucking yeah !
Sky, memories come back to me of the 1971 Bognor Regis Free Festival, and I remember the potency of the magic mushrooms. Oh, that was the furthest out my mind ever travelled!
Surely everyone knows that "Bursted Woods" is a euphemism for the affliction most commonly treated by Queen Mary's Sidcup of a Friday night, a couple of hours or so after Dickie The Rod has sold out of contraband Viagra in The Hogshead?
Hg, I don't move in such circles. I assume the Hogshead is a drinking establishment? Indeed, this is the first time I have celebrated the arrival of winter in Bursted Woods, as I am staying with my good friend Geoffrey before returning to the Midlands in a few days. My normal stomping ground is the Clent Hills.
I'm sure that "Clent Hills" is probably a euphemism for something too.
The two best known areas of countryside in the Birmingham area are the Clent Hills and the Lickey Hills.

Ooh missus, nudge nudge, say no more ...
pant heist.
right? thats what it means, right?
To be honest, I don't know what he's yabbering on about most of the time. As far as I know Pantheism is a type of shampoo.
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