Friday, February 03, 2006


Much has been said all over the place about the forthcoming Bloggies awards, but I am puzzled to see that last week's British Blog Awards Ceremony in London's bustling West End merited barely a mention in the national press (after all, blogging is the new journalism, as you keep reading everywhere) and almost nothing was said in any of the blogs that I've read, despite the opportunities for bitchiness and backbiting. Shame on you!

I mean, all the superstars of blogging were there.

As were Myleeene Klaaaaass, Dean Gaffney, Richard Stilgoe, Shakin' Stevens (aka The Welsh Elvis), Jodie Marsh, Jodie Kidd, Dick 'n' Dom, Giles Brandreth, Sir Lenny Henry, Sir Dawn French, Lord Ben Elton, Tamara Beckwith, Dwight Yorke, Sir Lord Richard Curtis, Helena Bonham Carter, Alison Moyet, Vanessa Redgrave, Jeremy Fucking Clarkson, Richard and Judy, Sir Bobby Robson, Oliver Letwin, Kenneth McKellar, Sir Ian McKellen, Ian McShane, Natasha Kaplinsky, Julian Lloyd Webber, Stan Collimore, Carol Vordeman (needless to say) and Chesney off Coronation Street.

Phew! Talk about a night of a thousand stars!

From what little I've been able to gather about the event, I've managed to cobble together some of the highlights:

* That Scary Duck bloke turned up dressed as a duck. Talk about being a self-publicist!

* GMTV's Jaki Brambles made some catty remarks about Girl With A One Track Mind's frock.

* Jonny B dedicated his gong to his newborn child and started blubbing, the big milksop.

* "There goes Petite Anglaise in the Valentino gown - very elegant" said Jaki Brambles

* That bloke from Random Acts Of Reality turned up in an ambulance! "That will be handy if it all goes pear shaped at the after-ceremony party" quipped Jaki Brambles.

Sorry, that's all I can find. Any other information gratefully accepted.

Gong to Betty. Next time old girl...

(Oh, please don't be rude about Richard and Judy, I thought they were my parents in the 90's when I was pinned to a sofa breast-feeding things that claimed I gave birth to them.)
I wouldn't have a go at Richard and Judy. I love their on-air arguments and Richard is clearly barking. It was great when they were interviewing Bill Clinton and he compared the fallout from the Monica Lewinsky affair to his own problems after being caught shoplifting from a supermarked.

Btw, the comment you sent to Geoff turned up on his e-mails. I think Blogger have been having problems because he tried to send a really long post on the (Contains Mild Peril) blog and it got lost twice. Perhaps Moveable Type has its advantages after all ...
get you with your talk of moveable type and wotnot

enough of this coy feigning ignorance about the glitzy brit blog awards event

'fess up now: you shared a limo with jaki brambles, didn't you?

and don't think i didn't read about you and carla romano getting kicked out of china white in the wee small hours of the following morning for dancing on the tables without your knacks on

there's no fooling us, B
apparently, after richard got nicked, posters turned up in the local police station (private quarters - whatever the british equivalent of the locker room is) advertising the "richard madeley sponsored trolley dash". marvellous. where would we be without richard and his unfounded empathy with menopausal women ("yeah, yeah, that vaginal dryness can really get you down, can't it?"). wanker.

ah, sunday.can you tell that "britain's psychic challenge" and its half-arsed nonsense is failing to entertain me? and my god, doesn't trisha goddard look a cunt in a beret?
No! Richard compared his stealing to Cigargate? Gawd, I do miss it all sometimes.
Urban - Well, at least I could've spelt it properly: it's Movable Type.

Oh, and this much I do know: Fiona Phillips has to have a handful of barbiturates and half a bottle of gin before she can face the GMTV cameras in the morning.

Surly - "Doesn't Trish Goddard look like a cunt in a beret?" should be among the Comments Of The Week, along with Delrico's one on his site where he demonstrates the crapness of the British transport infrastructure with the use of George Harrison lyrics.

Caroline - You should've seen the look on Bill Clinton's face as Richard told him how he could really empathise with his problems ...
Didn't Jodie Marsh say that Celeb BB would be her last public thingy? (I've lost the word I had a moment ago) ah, engagement - i think that was it.
Donna - er, it seems that she is going to finish that philosophy degree at long last ...
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